Have you ever heard Roosevelt's famous quote: Comparison is the thief of joy?
It's one of those things I heard years ago and it's always stayed in the back of my mind. When I compare my life to other things, I try and compare it to where we were 6 years ago. If you need a reminder, we were living in a 2 bedroom apartment in New Bedford, receiving food stamps and on MassHealth. We've worked so hard to get to where we are.
I am so proud of how far we've come but sometimes I find myself still comparing my life to what I see on social media... Two or three time a year trips to Disney, bigger houses, newer cars... it's hard to not be envious at times, but then I remind myself that the only person I want to compare myself to... is myself.
But for some reason, there is one particular person that I can not stop comparing myself to. Our lives are completely different, and not necessarily even where I would want my life to end up, but for some reason, I'm always checking that one particular person's social media.
Some days I admire the clothing and poses of the children, wondering why my kids won't sit for such a great picture. Some days I'm jealous of the fact that they are home all day, even if the kids are not home with them. Some days, I am downright mean in my mind, scoffing at decisions that were made or judging what they post. I don't like the more judgmental thoughts- they're mean, and never in my life have I set out to be mean. So I unfollowed that person.
I didn't do it because of you, I did it because of me. Because I am so in love with my own life that I can't keep looking at someone else's. That I can't keep measuring myself against a ruler I don't actually want.
I need to be selfish and continue to work on my self love, so while I'll be cheering on your life successes from the sidelines, I don't want to see them on every social media platform. We're in such different parts of our lives and I don't think those paths will ever be the same, so for me, I need to focus on my behind the scenes- rather than on your highlight reel.
So, like I said... I'm the problem, not you. And right now, I need to work on me and loving my own life.
Thank you for sharing such a touching post. I unfollowed a few friends for this very reason. I kept comparing myself to others and how far along they had come or how skinny they were. Ridiculous, meaningless things really. None the less, they affected the way I felt about myself. Pretty amazing post. Hugs!!
ReplyDeleteIt's comforting to know im.not the only person who feels this way sometimes. No one else successes reduce my own, but it's easier to recognize my own happiness without someone else's jumping in the way. And I think you are pretty amazing anyways!
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